DGX

I got an 80 on my evaluation (average). You get an 80 for meeting spectations on everything. John told me I need to have more incentive to be on a cash register.

I agree with that 100%. Too bad Piggly Wiggly won't give me the incentive through a raise.

Crystal, a cashier at where I work, has recently seen how bad her actions are and how they affect those around her. She seems to be wanting to turn around.

She's the one that reminds me of Danielle (for many reasons, except she's skinnier) and I'm glad at least she is fixing herself before her mistakes get the better of her.

This has made me look at my life now. I act very immature for my age, and unlike most people think, I'm not so nice when I'm not around people. Its kind of annoying how I hold back my anger and frustration just so no one else has to be bothered by my problems. I'm amazed I can do it. Even when I got my heart broken, not many people knew how bad I was hurt until I told them. I tend to want to hide my pain a lot. I also act very selfishly (who doesn't, but oh well) and many other things as well.

Anyways, I took a long look at some of the things in my life and decided I need to change. I'm almost 18, an adult. I need to be ready to make smart decisions, not blind mistakes. I only have like 3 weeks too.

I haven't had the ability to make the same mistakes most people make, like losing their virginity so early in life (and to the wrong person at that), or get drunk or stoned every other day, or anything like that. However, EVERYONE makes mistakes, its just that every person makes different mistakes in life.

Most of the times, though, I really do seem to have a glass heart. It doesn't take much to hurt me, and I wear a happy mask when it happens so no one ever ends up helping me. Every time I heal from a wound, it just gets easier and easier to get hurt by things. Anyone can really see through me and how much of a nice guy (aka pussy) I am and they take advantage of it. I want to lash out, get angry, yell at them, beat them up, whatever it takes just to vent my anger, but I can't ever seem to do it.

I consider my biggest flaw being nice to people, yet I also consider it my greatest strength.

I guess why I am so nice to people is because I want people to be nice to me, but it seems like it never gets returned.

There's too much going through my head right now to write down. I'm gonna go to bed.
-Kevin

Posted by at 11:33 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Merentha is the MUD game I play. It's a text-based Multi-User Dimension (multiplayer) game. It takes a lot of imagination and dedication to play this game, but I enjoy it a lot.

Here's the LiveJournal community website for it. They keep a lot of funny stuff from the game here.

I have my own LiveJournal set up, but its mostly based on the game really, so I'm still going to be using this BLOG.

One thing I selected out (because it was hilarious in my opinion) is a wedding ceremony on Merentha. Of course, it wasn't ordinary "I do" and "I do", but you'll probably like it.

"Edgar Rho" is one of the people I know IRL. (In Real Life, that term is used a lot in Merentha when discussing something outside the game)

-Kev

Posted by at 8:51 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Things at work are beginning to bother me.

First of all is Nick. His father died recently, so he hasn't been at work. It really sucks because he's always so cheerful. I feel really bad about something like that happening to him.

Second of all is Michelle. I can't STAND her! She pisses me off so damn much it isn't funny. Just today she had a store charge order and didn't know what to do, so I told her "You need to get a store charge from the office." She has the nerve to say "Well I was waiting for someone to do something around here."

On my way to the office I punched the filing cabinet. Next time I intend to make a huge fucking dent and when the Store Operator asks me why I'll give him a piece of my fucking mind.

Now that thats out of the way, I took this test on "what kind of heart I have". Its interesting and kind of true. My results were (and I hope this works)...

Heart of Glass


What is Your Heart REALLY Made of?
brought to you by Quizilla

Posted by at 4:35 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I'm poor at the moment. I'm getting a little over $400 in tax returns and I need a lot done to my car. I also want to get my own computer, but that might not be possible for a while if I plan on saving for college.

I'm planning on finding a different job, one that pays more than my current one. Trust me, I think I can get a job that pays more than $5.75 (or at least one that is easier and has same pay).

I finally have cable internet back. It's a wonderful thing that most people take for granted, but I can't say how much of a relief it is to have it again.

Anyways, I'm going to surf the web for a while. There's a lot I've been meaning to do since I have a sudden boost in connect speed.
-Kevo

Posted by at 11:53 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Danielle, if you are reading my BLOG, you might want to know I've blocked you from AIM, Yahoo IM, and erased you from my contacts on HotMail. Sending me e-mails will appear in junk mail and I will block you from sending them again.

And don't think you can just call and say "Hi!" and expect me to say something.

Posted by at 11:49 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Three days is all I have to talk about. (Feb 12-14)

Feb. 12: Jason B.'s birthday (16th)

Not much happened that day. I didn't get to see Jason, he spent the day sick. That majorly sucks.

Feb. 12: Martin's birthday (21st)

My brother can finally buy alcohol. We went to TGI Fridays to celebrate. He got the "Ultimate Long Island Tea", then some 2 other drinks. The last one was a kind of minty alcoholic drink. He described it as "liquid altoids".

Feb. 14: Valentine's Day

I had no Valentine. No girlfriend. Nothing. No flowers. No candy. Nothing. Not one thing I usually get from girls or whatever.

And to top it all off, Danielle wished me a "Happy Valentine's Day".

Wonderful. The person who broke my heart wishes me a happy V-day. Lucky for her, I kept my fucking mouth shut.

At least after a while I actually laughed at it. At her. At both.

Anyways, to more important things, Maelstrom died twice. TWICE. The first time I got d/c thanks to this stupid 56k modem. The second time I got killed by a friggin bee that went through my defensive spells.

I've been in a bad mood for a while. Anyways, I gotta get back up to lvl 31 again. Peace out.
-K

Posted by at 11:40 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I went through the whole day dirty. Whoopie!

I woke up and had to immediately go to school. Came home, the water was off. Stayed off until I went to work. Worked 6 hours and started smellin' too. I FINALLY GOT HOME and took a nice long shower.

I feel nice now.

Oh, and while the water was off, I couldn't use the bathroom either. Waiting until work to take a shit sucks.

Anyways, now that I've offended you with my explicit information of today's suckiness, I feel even better. Thanks! :P

My brother turns 21 soon. However, no liquor store in SC can stay open past 7, so he can't get that Bacardi rum he wants until Friday. HA! However, he can buy beer at the local Kroger that stays open 24 hours.

Gladius is a fun game. Cyas.
-Kevo

Posted by at 11:48 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I got a haircut.

I have no one that I really want to ask as my Valentine. I mean, there are some nice girls I know, some are single too. I just don't know anyone in particular.

I was planning on going to Flora and having a few carnations sent to Jessica. They do that for Valentine's Day, unfortunately it falls on a Saturday this year.

Wonderful. Yet another flying drop kick to the face from what people call "Fate".

Anyways, I bought Gladius today. Seems like a good game, it reminds me of Final Fantasy Tactics (the first one) but it is much different. Maelstrom (Merentha) is level 28 now. I want to get him to level 31 so he gets and so I can go places by casting a spell.

Games are getting boring. I really need to get a girlfriend soon. If any of you want to apply, fill out the form below.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
NAME: ______________________________________________
SEX (Valid choices are Female and VOID): _________________
PHONE NUMBER: (___)___-____
ADDRESS:___________________________________________
___________________________________________
VIRGIN (Valid choices are Yes, No. "Kind of" is not a valid answer.): ____
BREAST SIZE: ____ B / C / D / DD (Circle one, preferrably D or DD)

WANTING (Choices: Boyfriend, Potential Husband, Lover): ________________
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Please Copy and Paste form to an e-mail along with an attached photo to:
deathgigas_@hotmail.com

Posted by at 11:49 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Due to a Windows Update for Service Pack 1 that went horribly awry, I was unable to get on the internet for a while.

The fucking thing had a corrupted file in it and at the end where it did finishing processes it crashed. Guess what that means? Windows is screwed.

On an old machine like mine, it DOES NOT boot the CD-ROM on startup. It is also not activated during DOS. My dad put a password in CMOS startup, so I couldn't change boot up procedures, and I'm sure it wouldn't have helped.

Solution? Microsoft XP Home Utility start up disks. 6 in all. I tried to use the Windows XP CD to repair the damage, but a .dll file remained damaged and Windows refused to start. I had to do a clean install.

The good part? I gained 500 MB more storage. On a 6GB hard drive, thats an assload of storage.

The bad parts? All prior settings, although traces remained, were lost. Files in My Documents were buried deep into other files that I have to dig through to find. .dll files have been deleted for AOL IM, Yahoo! IM, RealOne Player, and so on.

I blame this on the BellSouth Internet Accelerator. Albeit Microsoft isn't a very trustworthy company as far as OS is concerned, but one would think they could make updates install correctly on their own computers. Besides, I have had downloads fail frequently since I have used the accelerator.

The accelerator compacts files into code and sends them as compressed memory. My computer puts it back together. Most text and files are unaffected. Quality in pictures degrade, but its based on how fast it goes. However, sometimes downloads have been corrupted. I've had to turn off the accelerator, clear out temporary internet files, and redownload things just for them to work. Therefore, I'm quite sure it was the fault of the damn accelerator.

It has fallen at the hands of the uninstall wizard. Muahahahahahahahahahaaaa *cough* ...ha...

Anyways, I'm back up and running. Other than reinstalling some programs, I'm str8.

I am not too worried about this computer. I might be getting a new one with the help of my parents, but I'm not sure. My parents are getting a new pc from Best Buy (I'm afraid of Best Buy's horrible customer service policies, they jipped my brother before).

I'm out. Gonna chow down on a pizza and I'm gone.
-Kevo

Posted by at 2:53 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)